Open Letter To That One Guy In The Harris Poll Who Doesn't Rank Ohio State #1

By Ron R. Clark

Yes, yes... I know I already ranted once this week. I'm probably taking a turn that belongs to another columnist. I apologize - but it's easier to get forgiveness than permission, and this is critical. Tuesday's rant was about doing your part to shape the present and future path of the United States government, thus by a degree, the global community as a whole - but THIS is about college football!

Mr. Harris Poll Voter Guy Who Still Refuses To Vote For Ohio State: Shine on you crazy diamond! Stay out there on the path of the Lone Wolf! Your conviction, your individuality and your perserverance are an inspiration to all the outsiders and the downtrodden. That, and you're a fucking curse.

Two Sundays ago, 113 Harris Poll voters considered Ohio State the best college football team in the land and one voted for West Virginia. West Virginia then went on the get violated by Louisville the following Thursday. Last Sunday, 113 Harris Poll voters restated their belief that even after a subpar performance against an annoyingly plucky Illinois squad, Ohio State deserved top honors. One voter gave that distinction to Louisville. Last night, Louisville gagged on an 18-point lead against Rutgers, and the Scarlet Knights blew their load in your Cardinals' face in anger beating Lousiville 28-25.

Time for a new #1, Mr. HPVWSRTVFOSU. May I suggest the Michigan Wolverines? Oooh, they're powerful! They're undefeated - assuming that same ankle-biting Illini club doesn't climb the Michigan pantleg this Saturday. They beat Notre Dame. They have pretty colors and interesting lines on their helmets. I don't know about you Mr. HPVWSRTVFOSU, but I'm conviced that Michigan is the #1 team in the country - WAAAAY better than my Buckeyes!

Yes, Michigan. Do vote for Michigan. They'll prove you SOOOO right on Saturday the 18th... against the Buckeyes... who've thrashed them four of the last five meetings... in Columbus.

Third time's a charm, right? You aren't just a spiteful trend-bucking malcontent pissing against the wind to prove your manliness and independence - no, you truly belive that teams like West Virginia and Louisville, who have honed their mighty blades against such powerhouses as East Carolina and Middle Tennessee State could beat the Buckeyes if they met face-to-face in the BCS Championship Game with OSU Coach Jim Tressel having five weeks to prepare, don't you? Of course you do... because you're a Man - and you can't spell Michigan without M-A-N.

Be the MAN, Mr. HPVWSRTVFOSU - cast that lone vote for the Michigan Weasels. They'll appreciate the sentiment.