04 March 2008

Primary Concern

by Knorr the Interpreter

Today was the Ohio primary. It was my chance to make my voice heard in government... by filling in little circles... anonymously... along with every other adult in Ohio with a rectal temperature above 88F as of this morning. I voted, becaue I feel it is my duty to offer input to this government of the people, by the people and for the people - that, and voting perfects one's right to bitch about stuff.

If when your time comes in the booth a scan of the candidates should leave you unimpressed, remember that you can always exercise the write-in option. If you are like me, you're looking for a candidate who will tirelessly fight for what is right, regardless of party affiliation. If you just aren't seeing that person on the ballot (and odds are you won't in November), may I suggest a write-in : Mike D.

The Mike D / King Ad Rock ticket is the write-in for the truly conscientious independent, for these fine men, along with their compatriot MCA, not only have the experience and the credentials, but are on the record for over twenty years emphatically championing the fight for your right to party.

Mike D / King Ad Rock '08: Experienced. Qualified. Licensed to Ill.

(Note: I know this would have been more timely in 1988, but The Beastie Boys were still in their 20's then. The Constitution clearly states the President must be at least 35. Had we not waited until now, we just would have been jacking off.)

Remember, on November 4th: Hold it now... HIT IT!

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